challenged

been reading a lot of shane claiborne. frankly i am very uncomfortable.
that's just what he wants.
dangit!
i had to ask myself the question: "i am going to be studying education/french ; how will that aid me in repairing poverty, or being in the slums of india?" the answer: i doubt it will at all.
i also kinda doubt any of the plans i had for my life will.
the closest was being a writer, as in, say, c.s. lewis, soren kierkegaard, or philip yancey. but frankly, their books mostly help academic-minded students learn some theology. the best outcome of it is that they go and do loving, wonderful things that these writers didn't do.
piece of--!
on the other hand, i like to remember that God's favourite thing is to turn things unexpectedly to his intentions and goodness. i don't even know what will happen tomorrow. how could i know what will happen in five years? twenty? two hundred?
there's some bright side.

also, i decided by accident to only capitalize God. believe me, it's a hard battle with the spell checker, which wants me to give equal importance to everything else as well. but hey. screw that. right?